Act Your Age!

Have you ever taken the time to delve into the depths of your brain and find your very first memory?  I always wonder, at what point did a first memory etch itself into my child's brain.  Asking them now won't do any good.  I want to hear how they remember their childhood when they're older.  What did I say or do that left an impression over other things?

My first memory?  I was 3.  I was sitting on some funky green carpet in our living room.  I have no clue what I was doing but I remember my mom saying "Act your age!!!!" and I remember being confused.  How did a 3 year old act? Was I doing it wrong? Apparently so.  And then it fades.....

The memories that follow are a huge mixture of every emotion possible.  I remember riding in our vomit green conversion van (with Snoopy in a spaceship flying over the moon...YES it was the 70s) with our neighbors singing Crystal Gayle & Carpenters songs.  "Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue"  "Im Sittin On Top Of The World"   I distinctly remember the unfortunate incident of me and a permanent marker drawing on the back of the chairs in the van.  (Probably why later my mother invested in a shirt for me that said "I Didn't Do It").

Yeah, y'all thought I was kidding didn't ya!?

School.  1st grade.  I met a group of girls that remained my best friends for years. Teresa, Amanda and Katie. We were always with each other and I loved them dearly.  Their families were still intact and....happy, and I was jealous.  I wanted to be anywhere but at home.  My sister left at 17.  My brother left at 19.  That left me. My friends witnessed things at my house that no one ever should.  I couldn't have spend the night company.  Well I could, but any fun we had was overshadowed by screaming and the sound of my father beating my mom.  Embarrassing.  I don't think I ever told any of those girls what their friendship meant to me as I was going through that.  I hope they know.
Any good memories of a possibly happy family were forgotten from that point on.  I have pictures of all of our travels together but when I look at them, I remember what it was really like.  Not what the camera caught.

  In 3rd grade, I met my Dena.  Dena Rae Hoover.  She was new to the school and we became instant friends.  Somehow, I meshed my friendship with her and my friendship with my girls.  It worked drama free.  Dena and I have continued our friendship for 32 years.  Births.  Deaths.  Marriages and divorces.  Seems like we have been through it all together and I know I'll have her til my last day on this Earth.

Middle school brought out a whole new me.  I met Davy-Randy-Heather  and Laura (more girls I am still friends with to this day!!)  Things were at their worst at home and I was getting older.  Old enough to get in trouble. In 7th grade, I was walking through the mall with Teresa, Katie and Amanda.  My mom had just told me they were getting a divorce and I was telling my girls (even remember it was right in front of what used to be Kirklands).  I don't know what I would have done without the solid friends I had.  Something snapped in me.  12 years old.  I started drinking, smoking and smoking pot.  Thinking about my children being 10 right now and doing what I did at that age absolutely terrifies me. 

Then came high school........